Alistair Campbell: To rid myself of you

To rid myself of you,
I went and took a shower.
I scoured most carefully
All the places where

You used to hang around.
I unscrewed each ear
And blew through them until
Their galleries were bare.

I took my eyeballs out
And polished them with spit
Until your image fled;
Then to my nostrils put

A little silver drill,
And after I was through
Those passages retained
Nothing at all of you.

So, why is it at night,
When I cannot sleep,
To my nostrils, eyes and ears
back again you creep?